Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
