Rock
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Fuck
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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