she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
