She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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