we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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