I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
