Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
