they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
