She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize