i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
