I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You can't special order awesome
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
