U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
