I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
