So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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