The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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