some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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