Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
my poor anus
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
