We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i barfeds in our rink
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
