He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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