i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
