she was so not down for the gang bang
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
