I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
