Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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