Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
