she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
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