So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
I cockslap morals
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I know her cup size but not her name....
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
