tell your sister to shave her snatch
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
