You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
