we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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