Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
