I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
