he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
