no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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