I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
