So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
May the power of my ass compel you!!
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
