I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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