there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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