sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
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