I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
your room smells of hookers.
And success
one might say we're banned from that church
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
