I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
