i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
