What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
fuck your aforementioned shoe
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
