Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
