It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
