She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Sacagawea was the original milf.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
We are all done wearing pants today
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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