I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize