At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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