Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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