If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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