It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
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