they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
