I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
